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There is this one friend of mine who never does her homework but asks to copy mine all of the time. She is a very close friend and I love her heaps but this really frustrates me about her. I feel like she is using me and I don't think it's fair that I do all the hard work and then she just copies it. How do I tell her what I'm feeling without losing her friendship and creating war between us?
Signed Used 'n' Abused.
Dear Used 'n' Abused,
'Copy cat, copy cat went to school and got the strap'. Well maybe not the strap, but a good chitchat YES. Solid friendships are based on honesty and trust. Let your friend know how you feel before she begins to believe that copying your work is 'common practice' in your relationship. On a warm n' fuzzy note, your friend is probably unaware that she is causing you such anxiety and poisoning the beautiful friendship.
I suggest to try and use 'I' statements - 'I' feel, 'I' think, etc. However, if you feel like a catfight (rrrrrrr!) exploit the use of 'You' statements as these imply blame and via some bizarre twisted way, you will be made to look like the BITCH. I think you know which of the prevailing options is the way to go! Good luck!